Impotent life

for the last few weeks i have been fantasising about what my life would be like if i wasn't an impotent tiny cock gay sissy loser and was able to be a real man. To this end i bought some viagra to see if i could get hard again . i took one a couple of days ago but nothing happened and i stayed limp and useless so i am now wondering if it is ok to take two or three of them at once (does anyone have any experience of this) Over the last while i have been saving straight sex to my watch later list thinking that i could perhaps have sex with a woman again after 25 years of being pussy free. Most of the collection is interracial (who doesn't like a big black cock he says feeling like a complete homo)I am wondering if i do manage to get hard would i really be able to preform with a woman, has anyone managed to give up the loser lifestyle or would i still resort to being a loser who is only good for servicing the bulls that my mistress puts in front of me. A part of me thinks that this is just a small phase and the desire to be normal will pass