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Married couple with children; some married already, others still live with us. Our biggest fantasy is watching another man or men (BBC preferably) with someone's wife. We role play this as well. We've been discussing adding this in reality to our own lives, but haven't taken that leap yet. Right now, we're having open conversations about it, fantasizing, and just enjoying the tremendous community here - learning all we can about the lifestyle before we decide if / when to take the plunge.

Looks wise, we are a pretty normal looking couple: Here are some basic physical stats:
Me - 5' 9", slim - 34" waist, 40 jacket, salt and pepper hair, brown eyes, not overly endowed; 6"? I should check on that!
My DW - 5' 4", size 2 or 4 depending on the make, 34C, long brown hair, big brown puppy dog eyes.

Update: As I've mentioned to a few folks privately, we've progressed to going out to clubs where my wife has gotten significantly more adventurous, which has really enhanced our relationship. We've spent a lot of time learning and reading on online forums about the lifestyle (safety, privacy, cleanliness, parameters and boundaries to ensure any connection would not develop into a relationship, etc.), as we've been together 30+ years and we want to make sure moving ahead would not ruin the great marriage we have. Thanks to all who've offered their advice and support! We really appreciate it.

Update #2: So, it's been a while and I thought I'd let you all know what we've been up to and how far we've progressed. No full on sex yet, but getting there. We've met a few guys at a couple of clubs in NYC who we've taken home with us. We were very clear about the rules and what would and would not happen. Everything we've read and all those who are in then lifestyle that we've spoken with told us that setting boundaries and laying out clear expectations are key to ensure we are all on the same page and that nothing happens that one party may not be comfortable with.

Anyway, so far we've had encounters with four men (3 black, 1 white for those who are curious), whom we've brought home. Lots of groping, undressing, touching, playing. At this point the furthest she's gone has been oral sex with all four - both giving and receiving. After each time we talk about it and what we were feeling during and afterwards. The turn on, the nervousness, the anxiety, the fears (yes, fears), and whether it was something we wanted to continue. We worked through the anxiety and her concerns as well and each time we agreed to do it again. I was there during all four times. We think we want to take the next step, but are not entirely sure at this point. And yes, there's a difference between oral sex and intercourse.

It's been crazy for us and we are each going a little nuts thinking about it what we've done, which is completely out of character for us if you knew us IRL. Our personal sex life though, is through the roof as a result since my wife brings it up during sex mentioning that she did the same things to a random guy that she was doing to me. It's kind of wild. I admit it's also nerve wracking as well. And so we are taking it slow as is our style. We love each other and my wife is mostly concerned that I'd feel disrespected or unwanted. I admit it can be hard not to feel that way at times. And so we remain cautious and careful. And we talk about it. A lot. As I've said further above, we've been together 30+ years and our marriage is the most important thing to us and if this would cause any break in that, well, it's just not worth it. So...slowly onwards and forwards. Thanks for reading!

Update #3: Haven’t posted an update in a bit and people have asked what’s been happening with us, so here goes. In short, yes, we have gone all the way.

Okay, longer answer. We started seriously discussing full on hotwifing back in the spring and we both agreed to go for it during the summer. It’s been about 6 months since then and my wife has had sex with three men during that time. The pacing works well for us. We have a few places we’ve gone to before that have been good areas for us to meet people, and so that’s where we went back to. As always, we meet someone, strike up a conversation, have drinks and leave it at that. Then, my wife and I discuss our likes and dislikes and whether there’s interest and potential to take it further. There were a few times where it was a no-go after the first meet, and the logistics can be tricky, it we made it work. After that initial meeting, we have a second around dinner where we discuss getting together, what it would entail, health and safety, etc. And then, we have the third meeting.

It seems my my wife has a type and is a little bit of a size queen. Who knew? All 3 men were black, good looking, and physically fit / muscular. I guess this whole thing is exploring fantasies so why not? They were not rough with her (part of our ground rules) and wore protection (that too). Slow, methodical, lovemaking and through the roof erotic. Mostly, I watched, held her hand, or stroked her hair. I’ve never been so turned on and had so many knots in my stomach at the same time!

As I said, we like the pacing of once every two months and holiday season will be tough, but for now, this is something we plan to continue to do - take it slow, make sure we’re both enjoying and getting what we want out of it, communicating, and always loving each other through it all.

Update #4: Just a quickie. We took a break for a while. My wife had a personal health issue and subsequent surgery (thank God she’s okay), so life in general was sort of chaotic and on hold for a while, let alone this extracurricular activity. She’s fully recovered and we actually got back into things right after the New Year. It was strange, but after the hiatus, this last meeting was more intense than I’ve ever seen her before. I think after a major health scare she was going through a life affirming stage - like a grab life by the horns kind of things and also to prove to herself and me that she’s still herself. A vibrant and sexy woman. From my POV it’s been amazing to see her bounce back and let herself go. It’s very empowering for both of us and makes us appreciate what we have and our relationship.

I just read that back and didn’t mean to get so touchy-feely! But that’s what been going on in our lives, for better or for worse.

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